The Good Kind of Dorky


Tuesday, January 22, 2008

How do you feel about giving up "marital relations" a few months before the wedding? Born again virgin or just plain dumb? You decide.

First of all, I am in shock. So very sad.

Now onto your regularly scheduled program.

Not regular enough because I realized today that I haven't posted in a week. Blame the wedding.

It is hard for me to believe that in just over 4 months, this wedding is actually going to happen. I've been plugging away at my wedding to-do list and trying to get things checked off. I have my own personal list that is messy and has scribbles all over, and then I have my electronic checklist thanks to the blessing that is The Knot. Oh thank goodness for that little website and its fabulous organizational skillz.

Just today I was able to mark off "order wedding bands." I also made a trial run hair/make-up appointment with the salon that robbed me. I also made an appointment to get my hair cut and colored on February 2. I am trying a less expensive stylist. Apparently the one I chose the first time is a master stylist. Hopefully I'll like this new person because she only charges $35 for a cut. Too bad I'll be spending the big bucks (read: $100+) to have a full head of highlights put in. Normally, I am a DIY hair colorist, but with the wedding coming up I want to have it professionally dyed a few times before the big day. You know, to perfect the color. I figure Audrey and Co.'s Get Active Get Awesome, or GAGA, is taking the place of a personal trainer so I'm actually SAVING money. Right?

I am not one to share my to-do list with the world on a regular basis, but since you are just dying to know what I still have left to do, I'm going to tell you. Your welcome.

Order invitations
Buy/make favors
Book honeymoon
Get flower girl basket and other ceremony things (unity candle, etc.)
Buy champagne flutes for Edgar and me
Get bubbles for after ceremony
Sparklers for after reception
Design/choose a program cover
Book hotel for wedding night/block off rooms at hotels for out of town guests (waiting to hear Back from Marriott Account Exec.)
Touch base with Church's "flower chair" (left msg)
Make final decision on tuxes and get measurements of all the men
Choose bridesmaid shoes (any websites you would recommend would be a huge help!)
Choose bridesmaid jewelry
Gifts for people
Ask another person to read in my wedding. I already asked my aunt and she said yes! Also, my uncle, he will be bag piping!
Meet with the DJ
Book rehearsal dinner
Call the woman who is supposed to be doing bead work on my dress and yell at her for not calling me three weeks ago when she said she would. Also, she was supposed to do the beading in DECEMBER
Try not to kill bead work/dress lady before the BIG DAY
Get the indecisive MILF of the Bride, or MOB, to decide on a dress (possibly a topic of conversation for another day)
Okay, there are certainly a million more things I need to do before June 7, but these are the ones on the forefront of my mind.

Stop ranting about everything I need to do on this blog might make the list at some point. But not yet.

Recent things I've done:
Well two weekends ago I met with the caterer of the country club where our reception is, last weekend I met with the florist. This weekend I'm meeting with the cake lady. The weekend after I am getting my hair done (only semi-wedding related) and the weekend after that I am meeting with the Church's organist. So, if you want to see me between now and June 7, I really will have to pencil you in.


  • At 9:12 PM, Anonymous Erin said…

    I don't really get the giving up of relations prior to the wedding...but that's just me. If it's meaningful for you, then cool....if not, then why bother?

    Good luck with your to-do list!

  • At 9:28 PM, Blogger Sue said…

    Dude, there's not much for me to give up. If I were 4 months from getting married to Paul, I'd only miss out on 4 opportunities (based on how things have been for the last year or so).

  • At 9:39 PM, Blogger Julie said…

    So are we not getting together Friday night in DC??


  • At 9:39 PM, Blogger Julie said…

    Oh and to the title of this post....

    Um.. are you serious??
    That would make me so stressed out!


  • At 9:58 AM, Blogger *~*Cece*~* said…

    I think you guys should bone the night before.

  • At 10:09 AM, Blogger Nic said…

    I don't really get the idea of abstaining right before the wedding if you've already been having sex. I think it's far more stressful to try and give it up and it puts a lot of pressure on you for the wedding night when you're both going to be rip roaring exhausted.

  • At 10:39 AM, Blogger Mrs. Higrens said…

    Yeah. Whatever. It's not like saying your vows makes things all sparkly and new in that area.

    And that To Do list seems awfully long, but I KNOW that it will all get done. It's amazing how everything does come together.

    (oh, and I am totally shocked and saddened about Heath Ledger.)

  • At 10:53 AM, Blogger L Sass said…

    I like the idea of giving up relations before the wedding. Some friends of mine did six months, and they said that one month would have been ENOUGH.

  • At 11:21 AM, Anonymous cady said…

    i don't really see the point in giving up relations before the wedding. i am, however, big on not spending the night before together. joe and i did not see each other from about 10 p.m. or so the night before until i walked down the aisle. good luck with your list! i can't wait to hear how it goes between now and then. :)

  • At 12:01 PM, Blogger Marriage-101 said…

    We didn't do the nasty for a month before - more than that and you'd have a VERY cranky bride-and-groom-to-be. It's not really that big of a deal, but I did find that we were much more anxious to get to the hotel after the reception. It made it a little more special, I think.

  • At 12:09 PM, Blogger Frema said…

    Since you're asking, I don't see the point in abstaining if you've already done it. Your wedding night will be special no matter what because it'll be your first time as a married couple. Good luck with whatever you decide, though!

  • At 2:39 PM, Anonymous audrey said…

    Tim and I spent the 2 nights before the wedding apart, and that was definitely enough. I definitely wouldn't abstain for more than a week or two.

    I was in love with my Knot to-do list.

  • At 3:11 PM, Blogger Kevin said…

    Should be no problem. I'm working on going 1 year 4 months at the moment.

  • At 8:33 PM, Blogger Carrie said…

    I couldn't give up the sex. It is too much apart of love. IMO it would be like not having him tell me he loves me for months. But to each their own.

    Add this to your list:
    A relaxing massage.

  • At 11:13 AM, Blogger Aimee said…

    Um, I thought you guys were pure! I mean, you guys are actually doing it already?! But you're not married!!


    Sorry, I had to.

  • At 5:42 PM, Blogger Isabel said…

    Hi. The King and I didn't sleep together until we were married. So I'm not much help in this topic. But I'd say to at least spend the last few nights apart from each other. That's sounds like enough time! :-)

    And really, four months?? You JUST got engaged!!

  • At 2:24 PM, Blogger Making my way in PA said…

    Brooks and I held out for one month prior. I think that it made the nite of a little more exciting. My thoughts on those that weren't having sex beforehand, they should have had to restrain from doing anything prior to. Just because I am an asshole like that.

  • At 1:47 PM, Blogger Operation Pink Herring said…

    Oh man... I have so much to learn.

    I am torn on the giving up sex before the wedding issue. Personally, I think I'd want to do it for maybe two weeks... I can guarantee that if I proposed six months Joel would take the ring back and move out. But then again, I don't want to put any more pressure on The Big Night to be oh so perfect and romantic! I wouldn't want to build it up in my head and have it be as much of a total letdown as My First Time was.


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