The Good Kind of Dorky


Thursday, February 14, 2008

When I think about you I touch myself

In honor of Valentine's Day I thought I'd bring you a love poem I found in my former co-workers "My Documents" section of her computer while I was looking for a file. Along with her resume and other personal documents was this little gem.

This morning I cried

Not because I was sad

Not because something was wrong

For once I feel a sense of wanting to be loved

I find myself wanting to give love in over abundance to someone special

Someone that allows me to talk about any and everything

Someone that admires my southern swagger

Someone whose laugh sends tingles through my body

It seems as if that year of waiting never existed

We’ve stepped back in without missing a beat…

I find myself touching and caressing myself

But in my mind I’m visioning you

At this moment of intimate thought my hands are no longer my hands they are yours

Exploring the depths of my woman hood

Indulging in my warm and my moist treasure that I am sure you would enjoy

As I continue to explore and reach a climax from the indescribable and long awaited sensation from your touch

I shed a single tear

For it is at this moment that I realize that I miss you immensely and how much I long for your touch…

I open myself up to you

My heart

My mind

My Body

My Soul

My inner most thoughts

I open myself up to the touch of your hands

The touch of your lips

The touch of your body co-existing with mine

The thought of you loving me in ways I thought were only meant for fairy tale romances…

And I again I cried

Not because I am sad

Not because of something being wrong

But because of you and the happiness you have bestowed upon my heart.


11:32 am (so glad she documented the exact time, aren't you?)

Remember kiddies, delete your files before you leave your company....and have a Happy Valentine's Day!


  • At 8:55 AM, Blogger Marriage-101 said…

    Um...uh...hmmm...HAHAHAHA! I can't help giggling like a school girl at that. That's a very good lesson. Excuse me now. I must go delete my own masturbation poem from my computer.

  • At 9:34 AM, Blogger Mrs. Higrens said…

    Oh yeah.


    Happy V Day to you!

  • At 9:35 AM, Blogger Mrs. Higrens said…

    ps. I tagged you for a meme.

  • At 11:16 AM, Blogger Operation Pink Herring said…

    Think she would mind if I printed that out and put it in my card for Joel?

  • At 12:20 PM, Anonymous audrey said…

    LMAO at OPH's comment! And at the poem! Holy crap, woman, why would you even write that on your work computer? That kind of stuff should definitely be handwritten. But, I guess her hand was a little busy.....Ewwww!

  • At 12:34 PM, Blogger Frema said…

    OK, "warm and moist treasure" is my new favorite catch phrase.

    This poem exceeds every level of awesome.

  • At 12:57 PM, Blogger Julie said…

    Oh. My. GOD!


    And How long have you been holding onto this to share with us?

  • At 4:17 PM, Anonymous Ross said…

    This is the best thing ... ever.

  • At 4:33 PM, Blogger Sarah said…

    Ok Friend, I think it's time you confess to the internet. Just admit that this is the love poem you wrote for me and left on my desk. You don't have to explain the stains on the paper.

  • At 6:50 PM, Anonymous Erin said…

    Wow. I feel dirty.

  • At 6:58 PM, Blogger *~*Cece*~* said…

    LMAO! Every few months I go through my files at work & delete shit.

  • At 8:41 PM, Anonymous cady said…


  • At 9:06 PM, OpenID voluble said…

    OMG LINDSAY! You cannot be serious. You did not find this on the computer of someone you KNEW. That is just TOO MUCH!!! Yech!

  • At 9:19 PM, Blogger Carrie said…

    Okay. Sue must give up her keys to the bus to hell because I vote for you as the driver. You evil little...

    Note to self: delete everything.


  • At 10:22 AM, Blogger Sue said…

    OMG, Lindsey, I'm not only giving you the keys, I'm also giving you a special horn that plays AC/DC's "Highway to Hell" in it's entirety.


    That is soooooooooooo good.

    This is why I have a hidden folder for my stuff. Not that I'm writing pervy poetry at work (I do that at home ;) ), but still. LMAO!

  • At 11:28 AM, Blogger Aimee said…

    Please tell me that you did not also inherit her chair?! (i'm just sayin')

    And now i have another word to add to my growing list of words that are icky (including the words snack and moist)
    I'm adding womanhood.

  • At 1:15 PM, Blogger Isabel said…

    Dude, you are shizzing me. This can't be real. IT JUST CAN'T BE.

    So awesome.

    (My male coworker sold his old personal computer to my brother. He was all "I cleaned everything off". Months later my brother confessed to me that my coworker hasn't cleaned off the NAKED PICTURES OF HIMSELF. Good thing both of them are gay and could get some enjoyment out of it.)

  • At 1:17 PM, Blogger Isabel said…

    Oh, my coworker has since passed away (motorcycle accident, wear your helmet kids), and I keep thinking I should have my brother send the pictures to the guys mom. I feel bad that there are picture of her handsome son floating around.

  • At 9:26 AM, Anonymous alyndabear said…

    OMG lol.... remind me to clear EVERYTHING off my computer first thing Monday morning - seriously.

  • At 2:38 PM, Blogger L Sass said…

    Wow. That is EXACTLY how I feel about you, Lindsey. Hope you had a great V-Day!


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